comparison: a double-edged sword
I've been thinking lately about comparisons. Many times I have been told that comparisons are not good because we are individual and unique; thus, we need not think we should be like others. It's kind of like the Molly Mormon idea--you just can't be perfect at everything. So stop comparing with others. Stop worrying about the money you don't have, the perfect kids you don't have (or the fact you don't have kids at all), or the super golf skills you don't have.
But then I am told I need to compare so I can have benchmarks against which to gauge my progress. Thus, I should be aware that I don't have golf skills so I am motivated to take steps to change that situation. I will be more anxious to practice and spend time swinging at golf balls. In essence, the fact that someone is better than me is proof that the skill level above me IS attainable, and that should motivate me to move forward.
With this analysis, I am left with a battle that spills over into the world of poverty. People in poverty are survivors. Many times they don't take time to dream because they are living. And lots of times they are happy in their world. But I have also seen that when they have a chance to see how other people live--ie: a soap opera in America--their ideas change, and they all the sudden want to live their life differently. So, instead of being content with their survival, they would like to add a TV or a CD player to that survival mode. I've seen various shacks with a dirt floor that have a TV. A TV? I obviously don't feel that is a necessary item, but those people do.
And that leaves me confounded as to the power of comparison. It can both help or hurt. As such, there must be a balance that steers clear of the negative aspects of comparison and encourages the motivation of comparison. I'll keep thinking about that one.
But then I am told I need to compare so I can have benchmarks against which to gauge my progress. Thus, I should be aware that I don't have golf skills so I am motivated to take steps to change that situation. I will be more anxious to practice and spend time swinging at golf balls. In essence, the fact that someone is better than me is proof that the skill level above me IS attainable, and that should motivate me to move forward.
With this analysis, I am left with a battle that spills over into the world of poverty. People in poverty are survivors. Many times they don't take time to dream because they are living. And lots of times they are happy in their world. But I have also seen that when they have a chance to see how other people live--ie: a soap opera in America--their ideas change, and they all the sudden want to live their life differently. So, instead of being content with their survival, they would like to add a TV or a CD player to that survival mode. I've seen various shacks with a dirt floor that have a TV. A TV? I obviously don't feel that is a necessary item, but those people do.
And that leaves me confounded as to the power of comparison. It can both help or hurt. As such, there must be a balance that steers clear of the negative aspects of comparison and encourages the motivation of comparison. I'll keep thinking about that one.
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